Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Mom Jeans By Any Other Name

NYDJ. Guess why.
On a recent trip to a local department store we came across these fashionable pants for today's hip and happening moms. Marketed under the acronym NYDJ® or "Not Your Daughter's Jeans®," these snug-fitting trousers make a noble attempt to bridge that terrible gap between the "with it" jeans worn by the younger crowd and the dowdy monstrosities known as "Mom Jeans."

But, alas, I fear that the team of highly paid fashion consultants here at Random Musings have had no choice but to go ahead and brand them with their Big Red Stamp of Fail anyway.

We're pretty sure the fashionistas who conceived these had something entirely different in mind, but the first (admittedly uncharitable) thought that came to our mind was: they're not your daughter's jeans, because your daughter wouldn't be caught dead in them.

We have to wonder if the marketing team that came up with the name for these pants slept through their Introduction to Reasoning class, as  it seems a no-brainer that by labeling them as being not your daughter's jeans they are in effect saying that if you are the Mom, they are your jeans. Thus, by extension, making them "Mom Jeans" and transforming them (at least semantically) into the very thing they claim to not be.

Mom Jeans. The terrible reality.
On a more positive note however, the inclusion of a few pairs of NYDJ's® in your wardrobe is virtually guaranteed to put an end to Teenage Closet Raiding, both by daughters going for that "retro" look, and by sons still clinging desperately to the "Girl Pants" look.

Strangely enough, in yet another example of Fashion Sexism, a run through the Men's Department at the same store revealed no corresponding equivalent.

Here at Random Musings we wonder why some hotshot fashion designer has not unleashed upon the clothes-buying public the very latest style for men: Not Your Dad's Pants©®™.

We suppose the results would be equally successful.

All American Badass Dad Pants.
Rather than pants that rise somewhere around the level of the armpits with pockets you could fit your entire arm into, we'd instead have pants that were awkwardly snug, resulting in the dreaded male "muffin top" look. Or maybe they'd be way too loose in the seat, making the wearer look like his ass is chewing gum when he walks.

Wait. We've already got those, and odds are, if you're male, either you or your dad are already wearing them, and if not, soon will be.

But don't sweat it. You and Mom will look great together.